They have already.

A short story-

A woman approached the newest store in her small town. A store where life choices can be bought for a price. The woman, small in frame, long brown hair, lips a pale pink & chapped, she had a disheveled look about her. A black eye. She kept her hair loose, hanging just enough in her face to distract from the purple reminder of her reality. It stings to the touch. The woman walks to aisle five, war. She kneels down to the bottom shelf & pulls out 7  battles. A clerk from the store sees her struggling to maintain balance with her arms full, he approaches to inform the woman she may only purchase 1 battle per person under strict orders from President Donald Trump. The woman responded ever so gently, “But the ad said pick your battles.” The humble employee responded with shame for what he would have to communicate, “Ma’am, I need you to pick just one of the battles you have there & before I can let you leave you’ll have to submit to a grueling approval process for just the one. We will need your breast size, weight, ethnicity, your religious & political affiliation, along with the dates of your last menstrual cycle & a complete list of everyone you’ve been sexually active with.” The woman, overwhelmed by the prattling on of the employee, had a deep understanding of her soul & the demand she felt to fight every last one of the battles she had pulled from the shelf. Her eyes dart back and forth, from the employee to the two men armed by the door she came in. She bolted for the door. In a mad dash she refused to let anyone put a cap on what she knew she must do to be free. Free from the environment that was hurting her. Free from the man who spoke of love but abused her. The clerk shouted for the woman, “Ma’am please, I’m afraid that many battles will consume you.” She violently shouted back, “They have already.” With that, she was shot down in the parking lot of the store full of life’s choices.

I woke up with a heavy mind this morning. I was thinking about the women’s march I took part in last weekend. It is a global campaign to bring #Powertothepolls regarding women’s equality & justice. The march was happening in major cities all over the world, I participated in Dallas. No church organizations flooded the scene in support because things like birth control & abortion were being discussed. The fascinating bit about abortion is, Christian community leaders & their communities have chosen to support a monster of a man (DT) simply because he stands against abortion, they’ve knowingly chosen to stick with this world leader, who is not having a great go of it professionally, forsaking all of his clear moral failures simply because he “advocates” for this one agenda the christian population is attempting to enforce.

Let me tell you about my experience as a single mother in the Christian community. YOU ARE DAMNED IF YOU DO, DAMNED IF YOU DON’T. Quite literally. When I became pregnant with my daughter I had a choice, I made my choice. If you’re looking at where Christians stand on abortion issue you’d think they would accept that I chose to have my daughter rather than go the devastating route of terminating the pregnancy. But no, It’s not good enough. It will never be enough because then they focus on (& tear you apart) for not being with the father of said child. While in leadership at the local mega church, Keith craft – of elevate life church in Frisco, TX communicated to other church leaders that the relationship between my ex and myself didn’t have the “hand of god” on it because I had a child outside of marriage. What a joker. It is laughable now but comments like that are both sexist & a wild delusion of a deranged man. Single mothers, hear me, do not accept this behavior.

At the women’s march I realized something, we were out there advocating for women’s rights, that includes every tightly wound Christian woman who scoffs at women like us out there on the streets. Regardless of those women who belittle & criticize the effort, we are still there for them. We still showed up & those same women still benefit from our efforts whether they recognize or express gratitude for their liberties.

Once upon a time I was a girl, in a shitty relationship, with a shitty dude. He controlled every aspect of our relationship, this is my daughter’s father. There was emotional, mental, & physical abuse. I was one of those girls scoffing at the efforts of others because I feared standing up for anything & I feared making my own choices. My voice had been stripped from me & all that remained was a weak & impressionable girl. I didn’t understand the moral imperative I had as a woman & a human to give a shit about anything bigger than myself. I’m thankful today that women were showing up then, for these same events, to advocate for me to have my rights to choose. That was the most interesting part of being present last weekend, I thought, we’re out here for ALL WOMEN. That includes those who may never understand or advocate for the efforts. Those who are confused. Those who condemn or aim to dismantle such events. We’re out there paying the price for women like I once was. We’re paying the price for all the female pastors on birth control, the ones who would never admit to it.

The world demands of you to pick your battles with hefty stipulations to choose only the battles they want you to choose. To choose much less than you’d like.

Get out, fight however you need to fight.

-M

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One Reply to “They have already.”

  1. Amen! Well said. It’s an interesting perspective to be a single (and “only”) parent. I don’t live in the same type of community that you do in that it is more liberal here, but there have been more times than I care to count that I, or my daughter, was given the sideways glance of shame. If I had to do it all again, I wouldn’t change any of my choices or my life. I am whole and proud, and my daughter is a strong, outspoken young woman. I will always fight like a girl. I’m damn proud of it.

    Good for you for extricating yourself! Peace and strength to you.
    Kim

    Liked by 1 person

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